Warper News Network (2020)
by yoshi3000
Summary: The WNN is here with all your reality warping news insanity being the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We'll bring you our neutral outlook, reviews, and more content! (A parody of the news to talk business about Project Blackthorn and related projects.) Main updates monthly. (M for reasons) Sequel to 2019ver.
1. January

**A/N: The following is a parody and a fanfiction. I own only my characters and the plot. I also don't apologize for the following political jokes, but I will apologize if any other joke offends you.**

* * *

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**January 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your "new" anchors, Lapis, Lazuli, and Rei." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

_"It's 2020, we already have seven murders to throw in the year." Lazuli said dryly._

_"That's just Earth Prime's murder rate. Let's just get to the important stuff. The Spiral Empire's influence as it's got a soft grip on dealing Dimensional Scissors, Gem Weapons, Dust, and Gem Slaves. Spinel is still getting hit with accusations of numerous human right violations, but it's basically pointless." Rei remarked. _

_"It doesn't help that the ones trying to pin her were SJWs and there was the fact of Spinel not breaking any major warper laws, yet." Lapis said with a sigh. _

_"She may end up picking a fight with several big shots in the warping community." Rei said rolling her eyes. "And let's hope, the bodies don't pile high."_

_"And then there's the kingdom Pinkamena has risen. Which is ok for the most part…the OU is opening its doors to refugees. Pinkamena's even opening up to cure any horrid mutation of her past experiments. Of course, I doubt people will actually go." Lapis said looking down at his list. "Do we have anything else to do other?"_

_"I think we're supposed to politics. Switch to Goku with politics." Rei said as the camera changed._

_Goku stood in the middle of a room as politicians were in the midst of a riot. Goku stood watching gunfire, tables, chairs, and medieval weapons being thrown around with screams. Goku wanted to stay something, but decided not to where he saw a senator eat his own gun and fired._

_"Yeah, I'm going to the concessions." Goku said walking up to the snack table stuffing donuts in his mouth._

_The camera cuts back to the studio where the three were looked bored._

_"So, I guess we'll turn to Chi-Chi with bounty." Lapis said as Chi-Chi rushed on-screen._

_"Are we still doing the Big Shots bit?" Chi-Chi said nervously. "Because this costume…is a bit much! Judy clearly doesn't wear a bra in this!"_

_Chi-Chi stood in different clothes._

_"Look, we need to kick in 2020 with fanservice for our male audience." Lapis remarked._

_"And what about our female audience?!" Chi-Chi asked._

_"__What about __our female audience?" Lapis said dryly before getting thrown off-camera into their coffee table. "Oh dear kami, the coffee burns!"_

_"And we're out of time already. Look around to the New Year's projects and the like. This time around, things are picking up!" Rei said excitedly. _

* * *

(A/N: We're still doing this, and I'm still here. Here's to 2020!)


	2. Feburary

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**Feburary 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors, Kale and Broly." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

_"So, we got another villain crawling around?" Broly said dryly. "She's been in the news all week."_

_"Four year old sociopaths….just peachy." Kale groaned. "Well in other news, Trump was acquitted. I'd make a joke, but there's no real point to it. Just let karma do its thing if anything else happens. 2020's a new year, let the chips fall where they may."_

_"About the four year old supervillain? Are the parents stepping in?" Broly asked._

_"I doubt it. Since when has a rich kid ever got punished reasonably?" Kale said dryly. "Entitled little pain in the ass…"_

_"Moving on to news concerning the Spiral Empire, their leader has been once again accused of another terrorist attack on CN-Zen Kuro." Kale remarked looking down at her papers. "This one having targeted several garages across Bayview, damaging cars and putting the street racing to a halt. Costing plenty in damage."_

_"In other news, Pinkamena has placed a few universes and minor dimensions under her protection having found a few of her past victims ending up in other worlds. It seems she is actively looking to atone for her misdeeds." Broly remarked._

_Before Broly could speak, their wall exploded to reveal Dymmi floating in with a smirk on her face. Without words, she snapped her fingers and Kale broke out in flames. Broly's hesitation to harm a child got him throat punch and threw into an office. With glowing eyes, she spoke to intimidate the viewers, but someone interrupted._

_"Elite Councilwoman Katsumi!" Kale said trying to roll on the ground. "Am I glad to see you…."_

_Katsumi turned to Dymmi glaring at her. Boldly, Katsumi dragged Dymmi out by her ear who was not too happy over this. Dymmi could only glare and defiantly try to free herself. Katsumi threw her through a portal back to her universe before sighing in annoyance._

_"This year has barely begun and we're in a sea of shit." Katsumi groaned out._

_"Pretty sure our insurance company hates us." Broly said only for a lamp to fall on the cameraman's head giving him a concussion. "Yeah…pretty sure that's the first of the month to get one of those. Do we have anything else to report?"_

_Before could they anything, in scrambled a frantic Bulma with a document in hand screaming that this was important and a war declaration. Before she could say anymore, another stage light fell hitting the camera cutting the feed._

* * *

_(A/N: Guess we'll just enjoy the month of love.)_


	3. March

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**March 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors, Bulma and Chi-Chi." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

"What's up you warpers, and welcome to the month of March!" Bulma remarked. "Today, we brought you the status updates on Limestone Pie and Spin Alpha-5."

"They are still in the midst of a cold war basically…at least from Spinel's side of things. Pinkamena doesn't seem all too interested in a war." Chi-Chi said worriedly. "Whatever prevent the multiverse from a tailspin."

"As for CN-Zen Kuro, the elections on the rise as President Tara Strong is campaign to be re-elected as president. And there are other candidates in the running, running as a Republican we have Eustace Bagge, William Hargu-oh wait, no he got arrested for treason, Gaylord Robinson, Eddy Verra, and Yuki Yoshida. Ok, who's on the other side Bulma?"

"Edd Vincent, Rocky Robinson, and Johnny Bravo of all people are running for the Democrats. As for independents, much to shock of everyone, Peridot Periwinkle, Crusher Avalon, and Eugene Gar had all thrown their hats into the ring." Chi-Chi said excitedly.

"This is going to get ugly, folks." Bulma remarked. "It over.."

The television screen went to static before revealing Spinel's face.

"I've come to make an announcement! Desmond Bishops is a BITCH-ASS MOTHERFUCKER!" Spinel said slurring her speech.

"He fucked with that fucking mentor, Pinkamena. That's right, he took his 10th rank fuckin' quilly dick out, and he pissed on FUCKING Pinkamena, and he thinks his dick was "tHIS bIG" but I say "that's horseshit!". So, I'm making a callout post on the fucking news: Desmond Bishops, you got a small dick. It's the size of this orange, except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like." Spinel said dropping her pants.

"Oh god, censor it!" Bulma said covering it.

"That's right, baby, a nice big futarnari cock! All points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked that barren bitch, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck his earth! That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS!" Spinel ranted as she teleported right into Desmond's universe. "Except I'm not gonna piss on his earth. I'm gonna go higher! I'm pissing on his MOOOOOON!"

Using said shaft, she fired a blast from it to crave "PONY FUCKER" into the moon!

"How do you like that, CHERIE? I PISSED ON HIS MOON, YOU FUGLY WHORE! Now all of you get out of my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!"

The footage on the TV cut out leaving the news team utterly horrified.

"Did she just declare war on Desmond and insulted Cherie's appearance?" Bulma asked.

Chi-Chi got off ripping off her microphone and left the newsroom. They could hear her scream, punch walls, and Bulma simply announcing that Mirai Studios has a new set of projects cut the feeding saying goodbye.

* * *

(A/N: Well, that happened. Spinel has pissed off some people, but you're wondering what the hell caused Spinel to fly off the handle like that? Find out in the next chapter of FusionFall Infinite! As for what's new, Multiverse of the Stars will get some new content and Stardew will get a new chapter in the future. For now, things are slow this week, due to Mid-Terms. So, hang tight.)


	4. April

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**April 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors, Buu and Hercule." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

Before they could speak, Beerus grabbed Buu by his antennae and threw him out. Whis clubbed Hercule and down he went as the real heroes took their seats.

"April Fools, you warper bastards." Beerus said kicking up his feet on the desk. "What's new on the news?"

"Well the spread of COVID-19 has crippled the Earth, and China's continuing to be lyin' about everything. So…2020 being…2020." Whis said sipping his tea. "The politicians stop fighting…because they all got sick."

"Moving on to warper news of note, Spin-Alpha 5's biggest drug lord, Alex Sosa, had his drug den blown up along with the entire town of Beach City. Millions of dollars worth of coke burned to the ground along with the mansion. As for who did is was Tony Montana who lives like it's the 80's…still. Along with the aid of several no-name warpers and two notable ones." Beerus said as their images appeared on-screen with new bounties. "Two who have made serious strides and just had their bounties raised."

_"The Kunochi of the Full Moon" Enid – 75,600,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

_"The Ominous Fusionslayer" Maylene Shadows – 150,500,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

"Actually, I think Maylene's was unfrozen on account of something…but I can't be…" Whis said as the screen changed to show Spinel. "Oh no…please tell it's not a joke."

"Is this thing on?" Spinel asked. "Whatever. People of the multiverse, I have an announcement to make. Steven Universe is over, and to celebrate…let's blow some shit up!"

Spinel was clearly high as that yeyo as she revealed a detonator which she activated thinking it was for the fireworks.

"Oh wait, that's not for the fireworks. That's for the car bomb I had those Anti-Pinkers put in right outside the school those brats of Pinkamena go to." Spinel said twitching before getting the right one. "There we go! Now let's celebrate!"

Strapped to a firework was Comet as Moon was on her knees begging Spinel not to do it, but she did it anyway.

"Moo-" BOOM! Comet exploded into a pile of gore as it rained rain on the castle walls and on everyone.

"Well that was fun. But I need more cocaine." Spinel said as Sosa just explain that she can't get more. "WHAT?! NO! I need more!"

The last thing Beerus and Whis saw was Spinel going on a rampage and her throwing the camera at Moon's head telling to shut up before her footage cut out.

"April Fo-"

"Goku, not now!" Beerus said horrified by what he knew. "Well, I just got a report from news affiliates in Pinkamena's turf. We have someone critically injured. One of the school staff, Miss Cheerilee, was off-loading some things for class from her car…and yeah…it's a shitshow."

"Well, that's just great! 2020 isn't even halfway other, and I want to call it worse than 2019." Whis said with a sigh. "Well, it can't get any worse."

"So…uh…Twice died in My Hero Academia." Hercule said stumbling onto the set.

"And there's goes my reason to watch My Hero Academia!" Beerus said grabbing Hercule by the throat. "Why I oughta…"

"Excuse me, I'm here for my interview." Dymmi said before shown on set.

For one, Dymmi no longer looked like a child, more resembling an older child. Not yet a teenager, but close enough to be considered one. Dymmi's appearance looked different with the telltale she was messing around with mutation being the skull marks on her cheeks.

"Wait until the broadcast is over, we still have to go over the rest the news!" Beerus said gently pushing Dymmi off-camera. "Now where we were?"

"We have riots over toilet paper." Whis said looking at the list of news topic.

"No, that sounds stupid." Beerus said shaking his head.

"We got an increase of people at home because of the stay at home order." Whis said as Beerus rolled his eyes. "Productivity in the arts is up."

"Not like they have anything better. I better get my new episodes." Beerus muttered.

"Also Mirai Studios is having technical problems with their database. Of course, nothing was majorly lost, but a majority of their systems have corrupted. They can still write and produce episodes, but it will be down to a smaller scale until repairs can be done. Also until proper equipment can be obtained." Whis explained as Beerus blanched.

"But what about Maelstrom of Sta-"

_We're sorry, but technical difficulties have cut our broadcast short._

* * *

(A/N: Uh oh, it looks like Spinel may have pissed Pinkamena off. Sure, she did not harm her kids, but the teacher happens to be a beloved member of the community. And let's be real, if a person find out that another paid a terrorist group against you to try to kill your children, you'd be royally angry. I've noticed that I've been using the news to directly deal with the Spiral Arc for FusionFall Infinite, I probably should not do that so often because it hampers it. Yes, I do have issues. My precious laptop is out of commission for the foreseeable future. Now, hopefully, it'll be resolved and I got all my fanfiction stored externally.)


	5. May

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**May 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors, Chi-Chi and Bulma." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

Chi-Chi and Bulma were dressed in skirt suits with touches of makeup.

"Welcome to all you warpers out there, you're in for a scoop. COVID continues to ravage Earth Prime and travel there for 10th warpers is completely halted. Of course, what reason would they have to go back?" Bulma said with a shrug.

"In warper news, the attack of Spin Alpha-5 was declared a rousing success as the universe and planet were ravaged by the joint efforts of Pinkamena's Equestria Unified Army and Cherie's Ocean Defense Aces. However, much to disappointment, whether Spinel is dead or wrong…is still unconfirmed until the body is found." Bulma explained as Chi-Chi sighed. "In other news, Mirai Studios is finally ramping out the backload of content for this month."

Chi-Chi gestured to Krillin for any bounty updates to which Krillin uncrossed his arms.

"Thank you, Chi-Chi. In recent news, the Order of Reality has working to process requests for bounties considering the massive backlog this month. Katsumi announced the request list for CN-Zen Kuro's Fusion Force group has been completed and updated." Krillin said showing the list on the big screen. "But it seems much to the shock of many, they now have tenth rank warpers in their line up."

"Also, congrats to Saki and Mandy for tying the knot." Bulma said from off-camera.

**_"Oracle of the Dark"_**_ Saki Shadows – 250,500,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

**_"The Shapeshifting Reaper" _**_Mandy Shadows – 250,500,500 – 6th Rank – Active_

**_"The Ominous Fusionslayer" _**_Maylene Shadows – 450,000,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

**_"Mistress of Mana"_**_ Gwendolyn Tennyson – 150,600,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

**_"Materia Man"_**_ Kevin Levin – 200,500,000 – 6th Rank – Active_

**_"The Jade Warrior"_** _Taeko Avalon – 35,000,000 – 6th Rank - Active_

**_"The Slayer of Fusion"_** _Crusher Emerald Avalon – 150,4__12,000 – 6th Rank – Active _

**_"The Blue Bullet"_**_ Marie Kanker-Avalon__ – 75,40__2,000 – 6th Rank – Active _

**_"The Former Queen of the Cold"_**_ Frankie Foster – 460,000,000 - 6th Rank - Active_

**_"The Princess Formerly Known as Frost"_**_ Elsa Lynn Foster – 265,000,000 - 6th Rank - Active_

**_"Fallen Frost Prince"_**_ Mifune Foster – 263,000,000 - 6th Rank - Active_

**_"The Third Frost Prince"_**_ Shinji Foster – 460,000,000 - 6th Rank - Active_

**_"Ganiax God"_**_ Yoshinari Tadashi - 3,500,000,000 - 10th Rank - Active_

**_"Vespa Goddess"_**_ Haruko Haruhara – 1,500,000,000 – 9th Rank – Active_

"Wait…" Bulma said before a man and woman on Vespas sped in. "What the hell?!"

"What's up you warper bastards?! It's Haruko to give you all a big shout out to what's coming in the future! Isn't that right, sweetheart?" Haruko said as Yoshinari gave a humble 'Hmmm….'.

The two raced out as Bulma sighed noting at the studio was not ruined.

"Well, this month might get better." Chi-Chi said hopefully.

"Yeah, and COVID will somehow be cured." Beerus said sarcastically sipping his coffee. "Maybe Spinel is dead, and Rebecca finally hanged herself."

* * *

(A/N: Yup, sarcasm. This month, I plan to fully reveal Yoshinari and Haruko. They've stayed in the background for a bit too long. Now for this month, you're getting all the content I spent all the last month working on. A bucketload of content on the backlog. Enjoy!)


	6. June

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**June 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors, Chi-Chi and Bulma." _The announcer said as the lights shine on the set.__

_Chi-Chi and Bulma? Currently were in bikinis much to Chi-Chi's annoyance. She did not want to do it being a bit shy, but a bit of an extra thousand to the paycheck to do the summer bit convinced her._

_"Happy summer, you warpers. We're here with the updates on the warper news with a bit of fanservice with a smile." Bulma said with a cherry smile._

_"I don't know how you can do this so easily." Chi-Chi said slyly._

_"Chi, you do realize that Rule34 is all over the net? This is basically nothing." Bulma said with no real shame. _

_Chi-Chi, upon having a reminder of that, calmed down. _

_"Now, I believe we need to bring up that one of the Amoral Aces was arrested today. 'Shy Snake' Shinobu Maehara was bagged and tagged today. Caught by anilingus, apparently. That's…humiliating." Bulma said giggling. "We sadly can't play the footage, but it's up on WXVideos and a ton of other porn sites."_

_"That poor girl." Chi-Chi said with pity. "So, where's she ending up?"_

_"Apparently, in her case, she's being shipping to an asylum for characters from the works of Ken Akamatsu. The Saint Hina Asylum…it's not a pleasant place. Hell, I'm promised she wasn't put in jail..." Bulma mused. "The Asylum's in a Love Hina that well…a warper Keitaro decided to covert his Hina House to an asylum. The treatment's there are controversial."_

_Before Chi-Chi could ask, Bulma moved on to other news. Namely, the aftermath of the Spinel incident. _

_"Travel to the universe of CN-Zen Kuro has been restricted, specifically travel to get into the universe will be closed for a while until it is seemed safe to be open. Travel within that world's Core in the United States has been limited due to reported sightings of Squash Droids in the area." Bulma said concerned._

_"Yeesh, and right on Election Year. Speaking of which, how is that going?" Chi-Chi asked._

_"Well with the primaries and a few incidents, several had to drop out of the race. Currently, Eddy, Edd, Peridot, Crusher, and Gar are in the running to fight President Strong for the seat_." Bulma said dryly. "But it's an uphill battle. I hate to say it, but they may as well save it for the next cycle."

"We got just an update…apparently Crusher and Gar are dropping out of the race citing…well what Bulma said about Strong's popularity. However, the other three are staying strong." Chi-Chi said reading the update on her phone. "There anything else we need to go over?"

Caulifla walked into the set clearing her throat.

"The coming attractions for the month of June. I got the memo from Mirai Studios." The Saiyan said opening up the paper. "Let's see, it says, 'We at Mirai Studios hope you are all safe and sound during our COVID-19 outbreak, take comfort that we are hard at work producing content. Due to circumstances, we've on a spree to edit shoddy quality in our recent updates. Bear with us as we work to fix this. While we'll list up what's getting renewed, I want to announce that a new limited series will be released this month. As a bit of an in-between project, Furthering the Ricked Tales.'"

Caulifla tossed the paper remarking that was it for now.

"I guess we can end the news day without something going wrong. This is Warper News Network, warp fast and warp free." Chi-Chi said as the broadcast closed out.

* * *

(A/N: Yeah, you're getting updates mostly to fix older chapters, but you'll be getting another Rick and Morty story. It'll be short like the others…probably a chapter decided to each member of the Merkowski-Sanchez family.)


	7. July

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**Late July 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors lives on the beautiful beaches of the West Coast." _The announcer said as the camera shows a sandy beach with Bulma, and Chi-Chi all in swimwear and on beach chairs.__

_Much to a viewer's surprise, Chi-Chi had a few changes. Namely, a blue streak in her hair, a helix piercing on her right ear, and her hair actually being down for once. Chi-Chi even retook to wearing her childhood bikini which was…a tight fit. She took off her shades first._

_"Happy summer, you warpers out of the multiverse. We've been enjoying our vacation." Chi-Chi said as Beerus and Whis arrived with a tray of drinks for them all to share. "Beerus? Where's Caulifia?"_

_"On leave. She and Kale won't really on reporting for the summer. Family vacation with them, Cabba, and the little one." Beerus said as Bulma took a sip of her martini. _

_"It was either us or your husbands, but they wanted to be on the field." Whis said classily drinking his Long Island Iced Tea. "Side note, they gave you their regards."_

_"Of course, they do. All right, let's get this over with." Bulma said._

_"First off, an update on the situation on CN-Zen Kuro's lockdown. It will be coming to an end by the middle of July and slowly begin the process of reopening with interdimensional travel to it being the last thing to open." Whis said relived. "At the very least, the lockdown will end, and travel can continue."_

_"You'd think this would cause issue with President Strong's approval ratings, but it's only dropped by three points. With the coming election, comes another in the running dropping out. Eddy is on the run because the greedy idiot decided to be sloppy on his taxes." Beerus said before they all shook their heads._

_"What dumbass runs for a political office without getting their taxes in order or think they could hide them?" Bulma said exacerbated._

_"In other news, it seems that Kenji and the Outsider have fallen on some hard times. Their bounties have dropped due to the loss of teammates due to Spinel among other inicidents. With four of their members dead, the money for those bounties is stuck in limbo because of Spinel's death." Chi-Chi said as the screen showed the updated bounties._

**_"The Deadly Outsider / The Black Demonslayer" _**Kenji Victoria Blackthorn – 775,500,000 – 10th Rank – Active

**_"McFarland's Survivor" _**Megan "Meg" Griffin – 565,000,000 – 6th Rank – Active

**_"Pretentious Horndog" _**Brian Griffin – 120,800,000 – 6th Rank – Active

**_"Kid Genius of Quahog" _**Stewart "Stewie" Griffin – 90,500,000 – 6th Rank – Active

The updated images for the posters all showed the four looking weary and worn down.

**_"Sly Spy" Lana Lockhart – _****_30_****_0,500,000 – 6th Rank – _****_Bounty Claimed_**

**_"Shifting Slayer" Jillian Wilcox – 1,080,998,000 – 6th Rank – _****_Dead_**

"With two exceptions being Jillian and Lana, who apparently were off-planet. It did not end well. Jillian Wilcox is now a resident of the afterlife. Lana Lockhart is alive, but unluckily for her…she's been bagged and tagged. This time, the Order has refused to disclose what prison she ended up in because of the escape of the Shy Snake." Bulma said with an air of sympathy.

"Man, it just sucks to be Kenji. Bumped down off the billions and half his team got shoved in the dirt." Chi-Chi said sadly. "Who claimed the bounty?"

"Whoever did had wanted to stay unknown…so I'll have to wait until it's eventually leaked on social media." Beerus said dryly.

"So, we even have good news?" Chi-Chi asked sourly.

"Anime Confessions is finally having it's third season episode this month…" Whis said weakly. "Apparently, we're finally getting a My Hero Academia character on the show."

"About time." Bulma said getting a refill from an intern. "Some good news for 2020."

"Seconded. By the way, the studio wants us to do some more reviews. Namely, you and Bulma have to do some." Beerus said as Chi-Chi choked on her drink. "Don't worry, you'll be paid."

"The things I do for a payche-" Chi-Chi said as Goku teleported right into the scene falling on Chi-Chi. "Goku!"

"Hey, I got some news! Big scoop!" Goku said excitedly.

"We're in the middle of a show, you imbecile…what could…"

Beerus was cut off by Goku showing everyone Rebecca Dill's wanted poster with the bounty marked as dead getting everyone in stunned silence. One of the multiverse's biggest pains was gone.

"Apparently, her bodyjacking caught up with her." Goku said simply. "Apparently, the body she tried to claim fought back and Dill lost. She's erased too."

"Finally! About time that bitch bit the dust…good riddance." Beerus said before calling an intern to get him a big bottle for him to drink to celebrate. "I'll throw a damn party. Invite everyone just to spit on an effigy I'll pay someone to make for me."

"And we'll end it here for the month of July. Stay safe and stay sane, everyone!" Chi-Chi said waving goodbye.

"Now end the broadcast before something bad happens." Beerus said.

Goku tried to get the last word, but the feed cut off.

* * *

(A/N: Man, what a summer it has been.)


	8. August

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**Late August 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors back in school. Son Gohan and Videl." _The announcer said as the camera shows a classroom in Orange Star High as the two were sitting at the teacher's desk dressed up professionally.__

"Welcome, all you warpers, out there. First time, we get to actually host the news." Gohan said excitedly.

"So, let's get down to the business. A rash of murders have been on the rise on a set of Ben 10 Universes, it's 'sub-prime' universe of the set had merged to make CN-Zen Kuro and by extension the Neo Kuro Universe. Investigations are being raised as it has been heavily debated to integrate those universes into Neo Kuro." Videl said reading off the paperwork. "Truly a shame to see innocents be murdered."

"It is weird we're just numb to this?" Gohan said as Videl rolled her eyes.

"Moving on, we got major news in the warping community. Dimensio, one of the most feared of the 10th warpers, is in urgent care among with his crew after his ship was utterly damaged to where it crashed at the infamous warper prison, Impel Down, leading to the escape of several prisoners, plenty of deaths, and injuries galore. Among the confirmed escapees is the spy of the Outsiders, Lana Lockhart, and Touya Todoroki, also known as Dabi, of the Metsu Marauders. Supposedly, Lana shoved Dymmi out the way inadvertently saving her life while trying to escape Dabi trying to shank her." Videl said as the updated wanted poster was shown.

The image was now of Lana with hardened eyes stabbing a fellow inmate in the eye.

**_"_****_The Scarlet _****_Spy" Lana Lockhart – _****_55_****_0,_****_7_****_00,000 – 6th Rank – _****_Alive_**

"Notable prisoner, Dymmi Dravonski is still alive and in custody…just with broken legs. Lana only really used the top half of her. As for the source of the explosion, we…"

A slow clapping got their attention as they turned to see three figures at the doorway.

"It's so good to be back." Shadlyn said with a sneer. "I wonder if Pearl's still not a warper, because I'd love to pay a cutie a visit."

"I got a bone to pick with the picks of them and that meddlesome Blackthorn." Yuu said as Gohan and Videl got into fighting stances.

"But the real show will be…his return." Jigoku said as the clank of robotic steps drew close.

**[Cues: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes – Dark Samus Approaching]**

**SMASH! **

_ "It has been far too long since I…have been away. The Frost clan is dead and gone…the jewels scattered, and my kingdom is done for. Alas, now for me, this is only…destruction!" _

The clanking of steps got louder as it came to light…the enemy long gone was back as a robot. The unholy fusion with the bits from the likes of the Metal Sonics with a mixture of Saiyan endurance.

_"Please call me…Elvitallix." _Elvitallix said with a manic grin._ "It has been so long….I must thank Dimensio for bringing us back into the fold. We paid him back with damage….lots of damage."_

Gohan was ready to fight, but the mecha just laughed like a madman.

_"Don't fool yourself, we're not going to fight you, but I have a message for all who call the Neo Kuro Universe home. I will be coming for my throne real soon." _He said before blasting the roof open flying away with the others.

* * *

_(A/N: Remember when Dimensio was a threat? Yeah, well, he still is, but not for the moment. You see, he didn't adhere to the trope of 'Evil is Not a Toy'. He decided using a bunch of dead evil nutcases to make into robotic nightmares was a good idea. Do the math. Ok, but let's be serious._

_Considering updates, I'm re-editing what I want while preparing to go back to university. Progress so far, I'm re-editing a few chapters of RWBYverse and Remnant's Four Shadows to which both will get the fixed chapters before I post up the new chapters. _

_Dragon Ball Blackthorned is in progress, and I fully intend to get it out this year. The Dragon Ball Arcs needs to be finished for me to move to Z._

_Anime Confessions kept being put off because life's in the way. Honestly, I need to buckle down and just do it already. Also get some more content for WNN aside from the news as I promised. Let's just make this month fruitful because I plan on doing as much as I can and update as much as I can by the time Uni starts on the 17th.)_


	9. September

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**Late September 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, questionably crazy like CNN, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors back in the studio, Son Chi-Chi and Bulma Briefs." _The announcer said as the camera shows the studio as the two were sitting at anchor's desk. Bulma and Chi-Chi had their business casual look, but Chi-Chi had the blue streak in her hair and the piercings. She even had on black lipstick.__

_"Welcome, all you warpers, out there." Bulma said excitedly._

_"And we're glad to be back in the studio which is finally repaired." Chi-Chi said as a light fixture fell on the floor. "Mostly. Now onto the news."_

_"In major warping events, Dymmi of the Dravonski family has apparently been pardoned of past crimes with her bounty frozen." Bulma said as Chi-Chi raised an eyebrow._

_"Is Elite Councilmember Katsumi pulling favors?" Chi-Chi asked warily._

_"Not exactly. Apparently, she was informed that Dymmi was apparently trying to prevent a major disaster. The reason she was rather…unstable was a combo platter of mutation and defects." Bulma said looking over the report. "What we do know is the rest of Elite Council is aware of this, but they are keeping their mouths shut on more details. We'll report more on matter as the story develops."_

_"On other matters, travel to the one of the Naruto universe is restricted until the Timeskip Bubble around it fades. As usual, another world goes through a heightened Timeskip Bubble. So, if you're looking for the Geistverse, don't even bother for until near the end of the year." Chi-Chi remarked concerned over the news. "Moving onto our most wanted: The threat of the mechanical horrors is still on the loose. Elvillitrix has been quiet lately…the Order's police force has no leads. As for the mechanized versions of Yuu, Jigoku, and Shadlyn…sightings been…a bit frequent across the Dragon Worlds. Time Patrol members are doing what I can to attempt to capture them."_

_The mood was rather dour as both knew how dangerous the mechanized trio were. Both were worried for their counterparts and others who could be in danger. They, themselves, were terrified that the trio could crash the studio._

_"However, we at the Warper News Network, continue to air. With heightened security, of course." Chi-Chi said nervously. _

_"Is there any good news?" Goku asked from behind the camera._

_"Well, we can celebrate all of the good stuff that happened this year….oh who am I kidding…this year is awful!" Chi-Chi said before sipping at the coffee on the desk. _

_"The Animaniacs are coming back…" Bulma hopefully declared. "And Season 2 of Meta Runner…coming along with Volume 8 of RWBY."_

_Chi-Chi had her head on the desk groaning in annoyance as Bulma rubbed her shoulder in support._

_"We live in the multiverse where there's a Cuties universe." Chi-Chi groaned out._

_"If it helps…the Elite Council has put a ban order on making anyone from that wretched Earth warpers or any warpers from going into said worlds. Hell, most warpers are all around pretty pissed the movie exists. I can't believe there are people defending it. What a bunch of shills." Chi-Chi said in disgust._

_"Speaking of that movie, I don't think we'll give a formal review of it. But what I've seen and researched, the plot can't even work because the main lead is repugnant piece of shit. They want to use her being from a religious family to justify it, but that doesn't work. If this movie is supposed to be the oversexualization and corrupting innocence, you can not have the lead already be a corrupted little sociopath." Bulma said shaking her head. "Plus, the camerawork is so cringy and uncomfortable…"_

_"Ironically, picture the movie instead as a piece of shit corrupting a group of a little shit. Honestly, screw the writers, screw the parents who auditioned their kids, screw Netflix for letting this fester on their platform, screw the shills defending it, screw the camera works, and **fuck the director.**" Chi-Chi said growing more and more stressed. "Ok, so anything in politics?"_

_"We have the 2020 election." Kale said walking on set._

_"Kale, who the hell cares about what crazy person is put into office at this point?" Bulma asked. "I'm asking about actual political news that we can talk about without starting a riot."_

_"There was a Supreme Court Justice who died." Kale remarked._

_"Well, rest in peace to that justice and thanks for the service. Anything else?" Chi-Chi asked._

_Before Kale could answer, Vegeta rushed in holding some intel._

_"I got some fresh information on what's going on with Dymmi." Vegeta said confidently._

_"On why she's been spared?" They asked him._

_"Yes and no. What I got was why she's fucked in the head. Seems her brain's an undeveloped and overdeveloped mess at the moment. My contact told me that basically she's practically floating through her Oracle powers with no control." Vegeta said tossing the folder on the desk. "I could not get where they're holding her though. The Order is keeping that a tight secret. Katsumi's doing this all by the book…I contacted one of the Blackthorn's associates but all I got is that Katsumi's keeping her mouth shut on it." _

_"She's taking her job seriously. I have to commend her for doing what does so alongside the other Elites. She's actually raised public opinion on them." Bulma noted. "But that's all the time we got. See you viewers later, as always warp fast and warp free."_

* * *

_(A/N: This is late, and I'm sorry. Either way, I wanted to get this out to use for story material for my next chapters in FusionFall Infinite, Anime Confession, and The Geist Within (which I will return to). Look forward to it. Hope you enjoyed the social digs.)_


	10. October

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**October 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, questionably crazy like CNN, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors back in the studio, Prince Vegeta and Bulma Briefs." _The announcer said as the camera shows the studio as the two were sitting at anchor's desk. Vegeta looked all the more eager. For the occasion of October, Bulma was dressed up as a playboy bunny while Vegeta was dressed up as Tommy Vercetti from Vice City.__

_"Well hello there, it's your prince of the mother-" Vegeta said before Bulma smacked him behind the head. "What was that for?"_

_"That opening line is trademarked by that version of you that's a YouTuber." Bulma said as Vegeta scowled._

_"Damn YouTubers." Vegeta muttered. _

_"Anyway let's get on with the-"_

_"Hey guys, we got breaking news, Trump has COV-" _

_Bulma hit Goku off shouting, "THAT'S NOT BREAKING NEWS!"_

_"Honestly, that's not a shocker. It was going to catch up to him, and we're supposed to be feel bad for him. I don't think so…not even worth laughing or talking about it." Vegeta remarked. "Besides, we have more important things to talk about."_

_"The debate?" Goku asked._

_"The only thing that debate did was ensure that the Order put a ban order on giving several politicians from both sides from getting warper powers. And that was not a debate, but a petty squabble between overgrown children." Vegeta said summing it up. "Now do you have some actual news?!"_

_"Steve from Minecraft is in Smash." Goku said as Vegeta and Bulma lit up._

_"Oh hell yes!" Vegeta said excitedly. "Now that's some good fricking news!"_

_"In warper news, the election for 2020 on the US in CN-Zen Kuro is going to be appear to be a landslide victory for Tara Strong to get a second term as more candidates are dropping out. And the debate last night was well at least it was funnier than the one on Earth Prime." Bulma said with a sigh. "We'd show footage to lampshade it, but we don't have the time today."_

_"Why not?" Goku asked as an explosion rocked the building._

_"Well, last night, I posted a tweet condemning white supremacy and Antifa among other things. It seems by some twisted logic, they're all working together to kill us all." Bulma said looking at her phone._

_"How the fuck does that work?" Vegeta sputtered._

_"At least they're working together." Goku said with a goofy grin as their door was kicked open._

_"Well, if you excuse me, I need to channel my inner Doom Slayer!" Bulma said pulling out a BFG 9000. "Good night to all of you, and happy Halloween!"_

_The feed cut out as you could hear the sounds of a raging battle. _

* * *

_(A/N: I think this one sums up the month already, indifference with a bright spot. I wanted to look around for something someone had said to sum up my feelings…and I did. However, I can't get that quote, but I'll just say something of my own._

_'__Am I supposed to feel anything? I can feel sympathy and empathize, but I feel nothing hearing Trump has got COVID. What do you expect when he has stated it to be hoax, continues to refuse to wear masks, and dissuades scientists? It was only a matter of when he would get it. There's nothing to celebrate about it…and it's disgusting of people to do so. There's nothing to be happy about…Trump's just become another victim of this year among the ocean of cases.'_

_2020's come closer to full circle for crap year.)_


	11. November

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**Late November 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, questionably crazy like CNN, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors in the bunker, Beerus and Whis." _The announcer said as the camera shows the studio as the two were sitting at anchor's desk. __

_"Ok, let's get the crap out of the way. Biden won the election for 2020, but let's me real…this doesn't really make anything better. There's nothing to smile about with both candidates being total pains." Beerus snarled. "And it's the reason we and the crew of WNN are hiding in the bunker."_

_An explosion rattled the bunker as Beerus groaned._

_"Despite the election being over, the politicians are still warring it out and causing a mess of things." Whis said before clearing his throat. "Now to the important stuff…."_

_"Yes, CN-Zen Kuro surprises all with their election being a surprise landslide not for Tara Strong, but instead Peridot Periwinkle of the Crystal Squadron…who is now the Second President of the United States. The first Gem president….yeah that's not going to cause problems at all." Beerus said sarcasm evident in his tone. "Not with the fact that there's still mistreat of Gems and people protesting that there was voter fraud."_

_"This year can't get any worse." Whis said trying to be chipper._

_"Disney is laying off everyone, Crunchyroll is trying to control anime, RWBY Volume 8 is coming out, and it's stll 2020!" Beerus ranted foaming at the mouth._

_A disheveled Goku walked on screen looking completely downcast…his spiky hair sagged with his frown. _

_"I got some bad news. Argit's busted out of prison and that wanted robo-vampire now leading a small coven. And about that cult…." Goku said as Beerus's eyes narrowed. "I got information from a whisteblower."_

_"And what did they have to say?" Beerus growled out._

_"The whistleblower confirmed a bit few things, and deconfirmed others." Goku said with a sigh. "Let's get the big one out of the way. The villain team-up…it's true, but with some caveats. For one, for her safety, she refused to name who exactly who was…but she told me who does….Joshinari Blackthorn." Goku explained._

_Goku did not get to be finished as Beerus had enough of the bad news before punching him and throwing the desk at the cam-_

_***BZZZTTT* We at Warper News Network are cutting this short as one of our newscasters has a mental breakdown. We apologize for the scare….please continue to hope for 2020. It's all we can do at this point.**_

* * *

_**(A/N: **__Who's the whistleblower? Well, find out next time in FusionFall Infinite, because things are going to be intense. As for the election, I wanted to objectively stay neutral in how it sucks at both ends. I want to say we can stop stressing, but I would be a liar.**)**_


	12. December

**The Warper News Network (the series)**

**December 2020**

* * *

**(Cues: Z-TV Techno Song)**

The logo flashes with three letters, "WNN", the Warper News Network. WNN is one of the three major news networks among reality warpers.

_"WNN, the place that's not fake-conservative Fox, idiotically liberal MSNBC, questionably crazy like CNN, and more classy than Nude News Network. We're the Warper News Network bringing you our neutral outlook! Introducing your anchors in the bunker, Beerus and Whis." _The announcer said as the camera shows the studio as the two were sitting at anchor's desk. __

"Ok, it's the end of the year. I may have been wrong about my earlier statements last month about the election. Not like it matters seeing we're screwed either way." Beerus admitted. "But let's talk about DC."

Laughter could be heard from off-camera.

"My lord, what's there to talk about. That 'I Am NOT Starfire' is an idea buried in the identity politics instead of actually telling a good story." Whis mused.

"Why is it that Western comic book writers seem to hate the characters made?" Goku asked off-screen.

"This is why anime and manga have been kicking the West's teeth in. It's like they haven't learned anything." Vegeta said off-screen.

"Some of them have. Western animation is improving…" Whis said hopefully.

"Ugh, this year. In warper news, the secret organization known as Cobalt has underwent a purge to flush out a splinter cell group. Apparently, the organization meant to be the Black Ops for warper society made some dumb decisions in hiring. We reached Director Trunks for comment to which he states that 'Cobalt deeply regrets it's failure for directing the splinter cell within our midst. We were working in tandem with the Order of Reality to deal with the fallout'." Beerus remarked.

"And we're getting a new show from Mirai Studios as a last gift for 2020. Coming soon, Our Anti-Hero Academia. From the madcap teams from The Geist Within, The Outsider's Insurrection, and Maelstrom of Stardew brings you a My Hero Academia story with goes PLUS ULTRA! OUR ANTI-HERO ACADEMIA! Coming this month." Whis said plugging in the ad. "Now…allow me to step out and for Vados to step in."

He teleported out of the chair as Vados teleported in.

"Yes, thank you brother. Now, on other matters, the cult is still active with efforts to combat it on the rise. Surprisingly, allies of the cults are now turning against them. The Big Mom Pirates that they sponsored to become warpers has been attacking several outposts on other planets. Suppliers are seemingly dwindling." Vado mused.

"I wonder if Anime Confessions will start up a fourth season….maybe we'll get another new series." Beerus mused to himself.

The news crew all shared a tired yet relived sigh. They had survived. Sure, the year was long and painful, but it was soon to be over. Hope for a new and better year was on the horizon.

"Well, here's to 2021. The New 20's is upon us, and it'll be a better decade." Beerus said raising his mug before taking a hearty sip. "Hopefully."

"By the way, Rise of the TMNT was cancelled." Sharpner, the cameraman, said.

Beerus flung the cup at his head in anger.

"I told those idiots making a new TMNT right after the 2012 one was a dumb move." Beerus said frustrated.

"Sad thing is…the show was pretty good. Could have been better, but it wasn't awful. April's design should have ditched the glasses though. Maybe they'll end up on Netflix." Vados said hopefully.

"…The same Netflix that decided Cuties was a good idea. Yeah, screw this. I'm done." Beerus said getting up and leaving.

SLAM! They could hear the door slam.

"Well, have a happy Christmas, Hanukkah, and beyond. This is Warper News Network marking the end of 2020!" Vados said waving goodbye.

* * *

(A/N: Man, what a year. But yes, I am producing a new story of My Hero Academia. It'll be nuts. Our Anti-Hero Academia is coming out soon with plenty of chapters to its name on launch. Let's just hope 2021 will get better.)


End file.
